I'm here!!! I made it!!! It took me 11 hours to get here, and it would have taken a lot less if traffic and rain hadn't slowed my travels (STUPID RAIN!!!).

I thought that I wouldn't cry because I cried a lot on Sunday. I also said goodbye to all my friends and co-workers and didn't even shed a tear. I dunno, I just thought it would be relatively easy to say bye to my mom and sister. Welllll that wasn't the case. I got in my car, set up my GPS, and then got out to say by. I just crumpled into tears. My sister, who never EVER cries, was sobbing along with me and my mom. It was just . . . it really broke my heart. It was the worse pain I've ever felt. Definitely a lot worse than a break up, not getting into the colleges I wanted, the fights with my friends, any of that. It was just this unimaginable pain I never thought I'd feel.

But after that I got on the road. It really went by fast, considering I was all alone. I zoned out a lot through most of the trip because, before I knew it, I was in North Carolina and almost to the apartment. I got to talk to my mom and sister a couple of times and I said hi to my MSOS Blackberry girls (HIIII GIRLS!!). All in all, it was a great trip. I managed to cut an hour out of the trip because it was supposed to take 12 hours. Woohoo go me!

This week my goal are to job hunt and explore the area. I'm looking at restaurant jobs right now because I need fast money and I definitely know how to serve and stuff. I applied for a position within the company I'm in now down in Charlotte so maybe I'll successfully get that job. That would be freakin amazing!! Until then, I'll just look for something that can give me a sort of income right now. I have school and bills so I really can't afford to be unemployed right now.

Wish me luck guys!!

Every Mile A Memory

I've never been much of a sleeper, and it's really only been recently that I've been able to even fall asleep. Tonight I have so much running through my head and I'm starting to get a sick feeling in my stomach, so I thought I'd turn here.

I leave for NC on Saturday. THIS SATURDAY. I was completely fine with moving all the way up until now. Don't get me wrong, I'm still excited, but now I'm extremely nervous. I'm leaving my friends, some whom I've known most of my life, and I'm leaving my sister. My mom will be up in NC in Octoberish, but my sister's staying here because she has an amazing job, and she has her own apartment with her boyfriend, so moving is out of the question. I'm scared to leave everything behind. I know I'm going to make some more amazing friends, but it's still nervewracking. I'll love NC, but it's just the fact I'm leaving everything I've ever known behind that's making me all icky inside.

Plus, it'll really show who my TRUE friends are. I have had this going away party planned for a month and it's tomorrow. I actually let one of my friends know a few days before I posted the event on facebook and she promised she would come (she was the one who introduced me to my ex and we were best friends for quite some time. She road tripped with me to Texas to meet up with him and her boyfriend when they returned from Iraq). Welllllll fast forward to this week. I text her a few times, asking whether she was coming because I really needed to know and I was hoping to see her before I leave for good. She writes me tonight "Sorry I won't be able to make it. Chris surprised me with a weekend in #@@!(#(!. I'll miss you though!" Wait what?? You knew about this for a month. I said you could have brought him, so this means you probably didn't even mention wanting to go. You knew I've been trying to get in touch with you all week. I know you keep your phone on you and you constantly bitch about your boyfriend and how much you can't stand him and want to leave him for a guy you met on W.O.W. THIS shows me that you really don't have any feelings whether I'm leaving or not. Whatever, like I said, this just shows who my friends are and who they aren't. . . . or something like that?

Alright, I'm going to TRY and go to bed again. I feel like I want to throw up because I'm so nervous, but hopefully it'll be daylight soon and I won't have to worry about sleeping lol. Yay party!!

P.S. I know this is supposed to be about me looking for love, but I haven't even had time for myself this past week. lol, I promise once I move this will turn more toward that :-)

I ain't settlin' for anything less than everything

I'm so excited to make this my home!! This is the view from our balcony. When I was there on vacation, the weather was hot but definitely not as hot as it is here in freakin' Florida. Ughhhh!! Every time I told someone that Florida's heat was so much worse, they looked at me like I was exaggerating and I didn't know what I was talking about. The best way I can describe Florida's heat to NC's heat is that Florida is . . . . suffocating.

Artsy Matt keeps asking me if I would like to see him before he moves (he'll be about two hours away from where I'm moving by random coincidence). I have NO idea how to tell him that, even though our date a couple of weeks ago was so much fun, I don't see him as anything more than a friend. I need someone who has a sort of schedule, a plan, or something. I don't want someone who goes out every night either. I don't know . . . I mean he's such a great guy. I just don't see boyfriend in him.

I'm not the girl who needs a boyfriend to survive. I refuse to settle when I don't feel that *chemistry* with someone. When I feel it, I'll know. Until then, I'm just going to go out and enjoy myself.